This week’s interviewee has been pretty busy grabbing the bull by the horns lately, so I was wickedly happy when he took the time for an interview. The horn grabber is Will Kelsay, Xterra pro extraordinaire, who may be best known for his multicolored mohowak. Last summer Will drove across the country in an RV and raced an Xterra every weekend in June, July and August. His great adventure stretched from New York to California…dang.

LT:  Racing an Xterra in a speedo, good idea or bad?

WK: Good idea if you wanna draw attention and make a fool out of yourself. Not a good idea if you aren’t confident about not crashing on the bike. And I’m proof that you should probably tan once or twice before doing it. Nobody likes looking at a pasty white skinny kid in a speedo.

LT:  On a scale from 1-10, how hard is it to get a woman to join you in your RV?

WK: 1 being easy and 10 being hard - about 8. If I “forget” to leave that fact out when I’m picking up girls,  I’m usually golden. As impressive as it is to say that “I own my own home,” usually they aren’t very impressed when I explain the details.

LT:  As a fourth grader, what did you want to be when you grew up?

WK: Captain Underpants

LT: While on the Xterra adventure, did you ever pick, hunt, catch or behead your own food?

WK: I hit a bunch of deer on my bike, wrestled them to the ground, but they got away before I could make the kill. I totally picked and ate a bunch of berries, but after having to run to the can multiple times, I regret that decision. I did go fishing in Crested Butte and caught my limit in 20 minutes. The trout were fantastic!

LT: I hear you are growing a mustache, do you plan to dye it to match your mohawk? and what sort of mustache do you aspire to grow? personally, I like the ones that curl up at the ends, typically sported by the villain in most western movies.

WK: I wish I could grow a foo-man-chu, but my girlie excuse for facial hair doesn’t even come close. After one month of growing what looked like a dirty upper lip, I decided to dye it purple. Big mistake. I ended up dying my lip purple and had to shave it off to get rid of it.

LT:  Have you ever run over a prairie dog while riding your bike?

WK: Prairie dog - no. But I have run over several squirrels, turtles, and mice. Oh and there was that moos-a-potamus rex (1/2 moose, 1/2 hippopotamus, 1/2 tyrannosaurus rex)

LT:  If someone offered you “X” amount of money to name your first child Phalanges Phlegm, what would “X” have to be?

WK: uuummm… I’m thinking about 50 bucks

LT: Anything else you would like to add?

WK: yeah, could I get a side of fries, animal style.