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Toby Talks Tri (part 1)

Posted in Fun, Training, Training Camp by
This post could also have been named “Toby Talks Twaddle”. This post is for fun only!

After today’s training, I am in the hole. I thought I’d explain how this differs from a few other terms such as in the box and in the hurt locker, as well as being in the bear pit.
 
“IN THE HURT LOCKER” – Usually the athlete must go to somewhere which has hurt lockers before getting in one. Hurt lockers should only be used for short periods of time, and under no circumstances should anything be left in the hurt locker overnight, as this is against most establishments’ rules. Generally too, most athletes forget to bring padlocks to the hurt locker or get into it on faith that nothing will be taken during the session.

Hurt lockers are for short hard sessions such as a hard swim squad or another super intense workout. Over-users of hurt lockers can sometimes leave things in them, such as empty sports drink bottles and bar wrappers; trash such as this is usually from olympic distance triathletes. Occasionally fast food trash and remains (such as chicken bones) will be left, usually by junior swim squad members. Getting into such a hurt locker is known as feral hurt lockering and is highly unhygenic.

“IN THE BOX” – The box is a one day deal. You can buy the box at Ikea or similar and get into it pretty much any time you want given enough commitment to hammering yourself into it. Usually an implement such as a cricket bat is needed to get one’s self properly in the box. Best done by beating rapidly and repeatedly.

AC getting in the hurt locker at Timex Camp

 
“IN THE HOLE” – Unlike a hurt locker it he box, a HOLE is something that can’t be dug in just a day. It takes days or weeks of toiling – usually outside under the unforgiving sun of warm weather training camp (cue wild west whistling and tumble weeds). Days of hard work are required before your body finally decides that it’s staying in the hole and no getting out any time soon. Due to the severity of the hole, generally the only upside is that it’s difficult to bonk in the hole, as you’re already too far gone. Also unlike bonking, getting in the hole can happen at any stage of a session, not just far into it, as you’ve been digging for days.
 
“IN THE BEAR TRAP” or “BEAR PIT” – similar to being in the hole, except that it is dug by one athlete for another – usually a training partner or rival. For example, you take your favourite rival out for a ride and push just a little too hard for him in order to dig him into the bear pit. Also unlike being in the hole, bonking in the bear pit is allowed. This is when you’ve dug the bear trap but accidentally go too far yourself and before the bear (other athlete) gets into the trap, you bonk early and fall into pit. Hence bonking in the bear trap.

Hannah in a variation on the Bear Pit – the Sweat Pit, which Scientists put you in during testing

And yes, this was Part 1… that means that there’s more to come!

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One Response to “Toby Talks Tri (part 1)”

  1. cervelo cycling jersey Says:

    fun

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